Last Friday's public apology from Tiger Woods spurred a wide range of reactions from the audience. I'm always entertained by these types of press conferences and thought that the Woods public statement was about what I expected. The public apology is an art and like always it has it's connoisseurs and critics. In case you missed the 13 minute extravaganza in which Woods apologized for the pain his marital infidelities caused his family, friends and fans (in that order), don't worry, I'm going to cover my PR thoughts as well as a wide range of public opinions on the topic.
(Professional apology expert consensus’s on Woods statement: Too long. Too much stagecraft. But otherwise, not bad.)
However, for all the expertise out there, and despite the fascination and great public demand for it, the art of apology as practiced by the average American person of prominence, whether in politics, sports, religion or business, remains by most accounts pretty unsatisfying.
There was Governor Mark Sanford of South Carolina: "I've spent the last five days of my life crying in Argentina" or Lloyd Blankfein, chief executive of Goldman Sachs, who offered a stinting apology for his firm's role in the financial collapse.
Experts in the field recorded other failed public apologies:
· A "Mark Stanford" is the sort of rambling, confessional apology that leaves you worse off than before.
· A "Mark McGwire" is the self-pitying apology that shows a lack of genuine contrition, and broadcasts your resentment at being caught
· A "John Edwards" is that apology which almost does not matter because you are for the foreseeable future beyond help.
· A "David Letterman" is one that works, but only if you happen to be a professional comedian with a goofy persona and late-night talk show.
Elin was not at the Woods press conference. I almost thought that Tiger’s statement was a, ‘please, please, Elin take me back’ press conference. I thought it was interesting how Woods kept stating that this issue was not Elin's fault, I kept thinking, when was it ever Elin's fault? Also, I thought it was interesting that he kept saying the issue was between him and Elin. We don't even know if there is a 'them' still. However, as Woods said, that is not our business.
In my opinion a good apology has to begin with a real connection between the apologizer and the offended person or audience. However, I'm not sure that most of the people who have risen to the top of their professions are narcissistic individuals and are just not capable of that.
I think the real issue with public apologies from prominent figures is that they don't sound trustworthy. It really hurts social trust when a public figure reveals to be other than who they claim, and then follow up with an apology that betrays them as having an immature personality, unfamiliar with the rigors of honest self-assessment.
Often times the person apologizing doesn't even state what they did wrong or how it's wrong, ask for forgiveness or ask how the offended how to make things right. I think there is not a lot different between a personal and public apology. In both you really should be specific, say what you did, ask the offended person not only for forgiveness, but ask them for what you need to do to make things right.
I like the public apology analysis an author at The New York Times took. He compared it to a cartoon features in The New Yorker last year: The woman stands over her shoulder-drooped husband. "I don't want your apology," she says. "I want you to be sorry."
Reactions to Tiger Woods' statement Friday Courtesy of The Associated Press:
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Woods' Family
_ "I said, 'I'm so proud of you. Never think you stand alone. Mom will always be there for you and I love you.'" — Kultida Woods.
_ "I watched it but I have nothing to say right now. I have no comments." — Father-in-law Thomas Nordegren, in Sweden.
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Olympians
_ "It's a bummer, his personal life. He's trying to deal with it and I don't think he knows how to totally express how he feels and I don't wanna say, come clean about everything, but explain what was going on. He's trying to pick his words very carefully and apologize. I respect that." — American gold medal snowboarder Shaun White.
_ "do we think this is coming from the heart or the paper! come on Tiger! give us some reality here .... thanks tiger. sweet hugs to your fam, can't wait to see you back out there!! Good Luck!! — American silver medal skier Julia Mancuso on Twitter.
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Golf Community
_ "There is anger in some corners, but mainly it is a sense of sadness. He's an American hero, and he's had his issues. At the end of the day, he's a human being. We all make mistakes. We all have made mistakes. And when we're lucky, we learn from those mistakes and we get to be better people." — PGA Tour commissioner Tim Finchem.
_ "Today was a step in the right direction. ... We know what kind of champion he is on and off the golf course but this is a big battle he's fighting right now. He's going to show to the people he can be a champion off the course." — Golfer Mark O'Meara.
_ "It's not about words, it is about actions. It's all down to actions. I personally think if Tiger wants to be a family man, get out and play some golf and bring the whole family out with him. " — Golfer and TV analyst Nick Faldo.
_ "I thought it was an amazing conference. I thought Tiger was very humble. And, you know what? I think we all love him as a golfer and as a family man. And we want to see what's best for him." — Golfer Ben Crane.
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Marketing/Public Relations
_ "He came off very Tiger-like, in that it was a little too rehearsed and a little too scripted for my liking. The more scripted you are, the more risk you run of not being authentic or sincere." — Bill McGowan, image consultant for Clarity Media Group.
_ "It looked like it was staged. These things should have come from his heart, but he was reading out of a script. I could see he was tearing up, but I don't feel like he was being sincere." — Puntarika Susuntitapong, public relations executive in Bangkok.
_ "What I expected to see today was some humility. What I saw today was arrogance. What I saw was anger. ... It was basically an infomercial." — Public relations executive Rick Cerrone on CNN.
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Media
_ "One of the most remarkable public apologies ever by a public figure." — ABC's George Stephanopoulos.
_ "I think he was very genuine in his responses and his statement. I think we are entering a whole new era spiritually and emotionally for Tiger Woods." — Debert Cook, publisher of African American Golfer's Digest, on BBC News 24 television in London.
_ "Looked like a deer in the headlights — the kind of expression people have when they're playing with him on the golf course." — NBC Sports' Jimmy Roberts.
_ "I have never seen him appear so vulnerable. ... I was very impressed with what he said." — CBS' David Feherty.
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Business World
_ "I don't think anyone would want to rush out for someone who, by his own words, says he still needs treatment." — Rick Burton, former chief marketing officer of U.S. Olympic Committee.
_ "It was good to see Tiger address the public today, and we're supportive of his focus toward family and rebuilding his life. He remains one of the greatest athletes in history, and as a long-standing partner, we look forward to seeing Tiger back on the golf course when the time is right for him and his family." — Peter Moore, president of EA Sports.
_ "It was 95 percent about contrition and 5 percent about golf, because the latter will take care of itself. Winning, good behavior and time can be his friends for the long term." — Vada Manager, former public relations official for Nike.
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Alleged Mistress
"I would be open to a telephone apology from Tiger, but I really feel I deserve to look at him in person, face-to-face, in the eyes, because I did not deserve this. ... I am sorry for my part for any of their pain, but you can't help who you fall in love with." — Veronica Siwik-Daniels, who watched from Los Angeles.
